I love you not knowing how, or why or from where...

Valentines Day has never been my favorite holiday, even in the years I have had someone to share it with; I never put alot of stock into it.  It doesn't take alot of thought or personalization to decide what to purchase...and as cynical as it sounds, Roses and candy can be bought at Homeland at the last minute on your way home from work.  Now...not to take anything away from these things....but i love things that are personal...and require alot of thought. Careful planning, and take what makes me  "me" into consideration. I realize how that sounds spoiled and selfish, but the point is this:  do you feel cherished every day? or just on a day when society obviously pushes, markets and pokes and prods, and basically forces your significant other to cherish you....or they are a giant horses ass.

My boyfriend is not the most romantic of sorts (sorry babe). It's a little lost on him.... he laughs at my romantic comedies, he mutters "that would NEVER happen" when they give their big "I love you speech" at the end of every single one, he thinks fancy restaurants are over-priced, and every deliberate compliment for 4 and a half years is followed by an insult/joke. He can't help himself. lol.

Sometimes I could just murder him. I want romance, danget.Sometimes I get a bit worried, i know it isnt necessarily a "cornerstone" in a life with someone, but a main problem is losing each other...getting to busy to stop and appreciate one another If we have already lost the little bit we have in 4 and a half years...what about the rest of our lives?

BUT:........................

That man adores me.  Sounds arrogant...but its kind of true. He says more with a look, a smile, a raised eyebrow, than any conversation i've ever had with anyone else. I have loved, and lost. I have wept over what I believed to be failure. I have been so angry I could rip him in half.....seriously. But no one understands me, accepts me, suprises me, and completes me like he does. I feel that every day. So maybe Valentines Day isn't my favorite, because it seems overdone, cheesy and a little fake. But what we have is real....and I hope the rest of you are as happy as I am  :)   The best words i have ever found to express this is a poem by Pablo Neruda....Read it slowly. Read between the lines. Figure out what he is really saying.    Enjoy.  :)


I don't love you as if you were the salt-rose, topaz
or arrow of carnations that propagate fire:
I love you as certain dark things are loved,
secretly, between the shadow and the soul.
I love you as the plant that doesn't bloom and carries
hidden within itself the light of those flowers,
and thanks to your love, darkly in my body
lives the dense fragrance that rises from the earth.
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where,
I love you simply, without complexities or pride:
I love you because I know no other way than this
but this, in which there is no I or you,
so close that your hand upon my chest is my hand,
so close that when your eyes close, I fall asleep.